Getting What You Want

Over the weekend of July 15th, Georgine and I attended the International eWomenNetwork Conference in Dallas.  Among several great speakers was the incomparable and much beloved Zig Ziglar.  In spite of being 85 and having suffered some minor short term memory loss as a result of a fall in his home more than 3 years ago, he is still traveling the world spreading his message of inspiration and motivation.  With the help of his daughter (who interviews him and helps him remember things), he shared stories about his childhood, his long-term marriage, and the importance of family – something he refers to as the “home court advantage.”  His talk was heartwarming and poignant.

Of all the things he said, one thing had the greatest impact on me.  He said, “You can have anything you want if you help others get what they want.”  This idea is central to respect because it’s about doing for others, honoring the needs of others, and recognizing that there may be others who require support more immediately than you do.  Now, I admit . . . this can be hard at times.  I speak from experience when I say that sometimes when I’m in need, I’m convinced that it is indeed the most important thing happening.  It takes self-awareness and humility to recognize and internalize that the world doesn’t revolve solely around me (or you).

When Madd-Steiny works with clients to manage change, we encourage small acts of getting what you want through helping others get what they want.  This is especially important during times of change because just about everyone is dealing with some sense of loss or struggling through transition.  Everyone needs something.  So, by helping others, there is an energy shift that takes place and the result is more space for solutions.  Sometimes, by focusing on the needs of others, we learn that our needs are not as significant as we initially thought – we might even let go of something because it’s clear that it doesn’t matter as much as someone else’s need.  Here are some things you can do to get more of what you want, during times of change or any time:

·    Every day, ask at least one person: “How can I support you today?”
·    Offer to take something off a co-worker’s plate.
·    Take on some extra assignments to reduce someone else’s workload.
·    Listen with compassion (and without talking) when a colleague needs to “let off some steam.”
·    Recognize the successes of your teammates loudly and proudly.

When I’ve taken the time to extend a hand to help others, it has always helped me get what I want.  I hope the same is true for you.

Lynae

No Gossip Zone

We heard from one of our clients the other day who was quite excited about something.  He wanted to implement a “no gossip zone” within his organization.  His enthusiasm resulted from a book that he read by Sam Chapman – The No-Gossip Zone.

Needless to say, he got my attention!

From our experience, nothing can sink a team faster than the disrespectful communication of gossip, zingers, and whining!  We define these practices as:

Gossip is going behind someone’s back and saying something about him/her that you wouldn’t want him/her to know you said.

Zingers are quick-witted jokes made at someone else’s expense. It is a way of criticizing others under the cover of a joke.

Whining is repeated complaining and venting of frustrations without any attention given to potential solutions.

Perhaps we’ve all gossiped, zinged or whined from time to time, and maybe we’ve been a victim of one or more as well.

So, how can we do away with these destructive behaviors and create a work environment of acceptance, fun, and empowerment that is focused on authentic and respectful communication?  Here are three action items to get you started:

1. Start with you. Be the change. Remove gossip, zingers and whining from your communication repertoire. Think of it as a cleansing process. No longer participate in conversations about others who are not present. Articulate your new commitment to your co-workers. It’s likely they will respect you for it.
2. Open a dialogue with team members about the destructive communication of gossip, zingers and whining. Call out each individual’s responsibility to communicate authentically and respectfully. Check out how Madd-Steiny can help you teach skills that give employees alternative behaviors to gossip, zingers and whining.
3. Establish clear performance expectations that define the behaviors of authentic and respectful communication. Address and deal with the destructive communication behaviors of gossip, zingers and whining as a performance issue. Coach employees to higher levels of performance and support their development to grow and improve.

Most sincerely,

Georgine

What Drives Performance?

I’m reading Daniel Pink’s newest book Drive.  The premise of his book is that the traditional “carrot and stick” approach to motivation doesn’t work over the long term.  He presents some compelling evidence to make the point and argues that it’s time for organizations to upgrade their motivation systems.  Specifically, he says that motivation systems need to move away from a focus on the extrinsic (rewards) to fueling people’s intrinsic desires – the inherent satisfaction with a particular activity.  I am intrigued by this idea because it speaks to the notion of employee engagement which is a topic that we at Madd-Steiny Productions are wild about.

When an employee is engaged, their “whole person” is involved in something – body, mind, heart and spirit.  Pink’s argument suggests that the traditional motivation systems speak only to extrinsic values which often only connect to actions and outcomes.  In other words, extrinsic motivation generally only appeals to what a person does with his body and mind.  For example: “Produce 100 widgets, and you get 100 dollars.”  Or, “Come up with 10 good ideas and you’ll get a day off.”  Now, for some folks, this is enough.  In other words, their main motivator is external rewards and any deeper satisfaction is secondary.  But for others, the main motivator is something that speaks to values of freedom, challenge, purpose and meaning.  This is what Pink suggests is missing from the traditional motivation systems.

In the book, Pink states: “Control leads to compliance; autonomy leads to engagement.”  To intrinsically motivate people, you have to create space for three elements of motivation to take root: autonomy, mastery and purpose.  Let’s start with autonomy.  Pink is convinced that people are naturally curious and self-directed.  So, when given autonomy people produce greater results.  (There’s loads of science to prove this, and Pink includes a lot of it in the book.)  Then, there’s mastery – the desire to get better and better at something that matters to us.  Unlike autonomy that happens in the moment, mastery takes place over time.  So, it’s an organizational responsibility to provide the tools for people to create satisfaction by becoming really good at something.  Finally, there is purpose.  Purpose provides context and people who are primarily intrinsically motivated want to know that there is a purpose greater than themselves of which they can be a part.

There is a lot in the book and this is only the tip of the iceberg.  But, I am really excited about what I’m discovering and wanted to share some of my learning.  And, some of my early thoughts about motivation systems are as follows:

• One size does not fit all. There are different types of people with different motivations – both extrinsic and intrinsic.
• Motivation systems don’t actually have to be “systems”. Rather, they can simply by inherent elements of organizational culture that create space for people to be autonomous, develop mastery of skills, and hitch themselves to a purpose that gives meaning to their daily activities.
• It is possible to do something new and achieve even greater results. We have to let go of old ideas that are producing average results and be willing to explore alternatives to help us achieve extraordinary results.

There’s much more on this topic that I will write about in future blog posts.  Let us know if you have thoughts about motivation that you’d like to share.  And, I encourage you to pick up Dan’s book.

Lynae

Respect and Teamwork

Recently, I facilitated a teambuilding session with a marketing team from a leading company in the pet products industry.  The day was exhilarating and rewarding.  I’m continually inspired by teams who are committed to creating deeper connections with each other and improve their overall performance.  One of the things we did together was select a set of values for the team that will guide their actions and attitudes going forward, and help them to achieve their organizational vision.  One of the values they selected, and a theme that surfaced over and over again throughout the day, was respect.

Respect for this team is paramount to their long term success.  And, for any team, respect serves as a foundation for more effective collaboration, innovation and problem solving.  Why?  Because when there is respect on a team, there is room for different perspectives and new ideas.  Respect creates space for passionate dialog around varied philosophies and a diversity of opinion that can lead to rich and complex solutions to everyday problems. When I asked the team to define what respect would look like on their team, they answered simply:

·    Listening to each other without judgment.
·    Making sure everyone has a voice.
·    Thanking each other for a job well done.
·    Sharing resources.
·    Treating everyone as equals.

Take some time this week and talk with your teammates about respect on your team.  It’s simple, and can make a huge difference.

Respectfully,

Lynae

Work-Life Balance

I’ve talked with three people already this week who brought up their desire to figure out a better work-life balance. With the current shifts in the economy and marketplace, I encounter many people with desires for a better balance in their lives that seem to stem from too much work to not enough work.

Work-life balance is different for each of us because we all have different priorities and different lives.  For me, work-life balance is the ability to split my time and energy between work and the other important aspects of my life – like time for family, friends, community participation, spirituality, personal growth, self care, and my hobbies – in a way that creates a feeling of satisfaction. This can be challenging as the projects in my work and personal life ebb and flow.  Certain times bring situations that require extra time and attention.

There are two sides of the work-life balance coin.

On one side is the personal choices and decision that individuals make.  Here is a simple process that will help you guide your choices and decisions.

1. If your life could focus on one thing and one thing only, what would that be? If you could add a 2nd, 3rd, 4th and 5th thing, what would they be? If you answer thoughtfully and honestly, the result will be a list of your top five priorities.
2. Drop unnecessary activities. After making your priority list, you may discover you’re devoting too much time to activities that aren’t a priority, and you can adjust your schedule accordingly.
3. Protect your private time. Your private time deserves some respect. Carve out hours that contribute to yourself and your relationship. Stop checking email and cell phones so often and use time to nurture relationships and renew yourself.

On the other side of the coin is a corporate culture that institutes policies, procedures, actions, and expectations that enable employees to easily pursue more balanced lives.  Here are some organizational practices that we have found instrumental to organizational cultures that support work-life balance.

1. A flexible policy on work arrangements. Organizations that offer work schedule options that give employees the flexibility to accommodate their personal and family needs, whether it’s child care, unexpected family emergencies, doctor appointments, personal time for school events, increase their ability to attract, retain and motivate a high performing work team.
2. Employee Assistance Program. EAPs promote wellness and offer employees confidential, short term, counseling services for personal problems that affect their work performance.
3. Management commitment and communication. Mangers who are sensitive to their employees’ personal needs promote a joint responsibility to communicate with one another on work-life balance issues in an open and trusting environment. This concept of shared responsibility becomes a win-win by valuing both business success and personal fulfillment.

With Respect,
Georgine

Reflections on Trust

This week I’ve been thinking about trust; the influence it has on relationships, the impact it has on our work, and the process that creates it.  I have seen evidence in many organizational cultures that trust can easily erode during challenging or changing times.

As I reflect back on the employee groups that we have worked with to build a respectful workplace, the common experience I’ve had with all groups is that everyone recognizes the power of trust and wants to build trusting relationships with more people at work.

Our experience with employees is that it’s pretty easy to identify what a trusting relationship looks like.  All we have to do is think about one that we have in our lives.  The characteristics that are identified are always the same.

• You feel you can depend on them no matter what the situation – they “have your back”
• You can talk about anything and information flows freely – even constructive feedback because you believe they care and have the best intentions
• Listening to each other is a common practice
• Confidentiality is honored
• You are able to work out disagreements – these relationships endure conflict and differences are honored
• Trust gets built over time. It’s a process.

The real challenge for most of us is how to regain trust that has been lost or diminished and act on it.

Here is some great advice that one employee group offered as they worked to answer the question: What can I do to help regain or rebuild trust in a relationship where it’s been lost or diminished?

• Approach the other person and request a time to talk
• State your intentions – i.e. you want a stronger, healthier relationship
• Stay mindful of your own behavior and manage your emotions, staying true to your intent
• Be honest, share your perceptions (using “I” statements) and request what you want/need
• Ask the other person for their perspective and what they would request
• Restate what you heard and commit to what you can and will do to build a more trusting relationship
• Forgive the past, start fresh in the present and create a better future relationship
• Persevere – trust is a process that develops over time

Best wishes,

Georgine

Respect for your Environment

Recently I took a short road trip out of the city to my home town to visit my parents.  The day was incredible with lots of sunshine after a soaking rain.  The landscape was lush and I found myself taking in the beauty of the earth.  Gratitude filled my heart and my mind and left me with a feeling of great contentment.

At one point during my drive I came across a group of Boy Scouts who were walking the ditches and picking up trash that had been thrown out of cars. I felt a great deal of pride in those boys and respect for what they were doing.  Having been a leader in our local Scouts organization when my boys were younger, I know that this activity was a demonstration of a core value in the scouting organization – good citizenship.

Our organizational development work at Madd-Steiny helps companies find ways to bring their core values to life in their work cultures.  And, I think that just about every organization we have met has respect listed as one of their core values.

The value of respect, demonstrated, goes beyond an individual’s behavior during interpersonal interactions.  It also extends into caring for the work environment.  I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard about conflict in work groups due to food left in the refrigerator, or dishes left in the sink or a mess left in the conference room after a meeting.

Establishing norms or expectations for behavior in your organization is one powerful way to bring your values to life and nurture a respectful work culture.

Here are a few behavioral expectations that we have seen practiced in organizations that demonstrate a respect for the work environment.

1.    Always leave your meeting space looking better than you found it.
2.    When you see litter in and/or around the building pick it up.
3.    Keep your workspace organized and free from clutter.
4.    Be accountable to pick up after yourself in shared space.

With Respect,

Georgine

F.E.A.R. The Acronym

I’m leading a workshop on change for a client in a couple of weeks and fear is always on the agenda whenever we talk about change.  Fear of the unknown associated with change generally has a significant influence on people, and I’m no exception.  If I allow myself to, I can imagine all sorts of lousy things happening.  So can lots of other people.  And, thus . . . the acronym: False Evidence Appearing Real.  One of Mark Twain’s famous quotations goes like this:  “I have been through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.”

When faced with change, there are certainly a lot of unknowns.  We don’t know what’s coming.  Nonetheless, we sometimes make stuff up about change and it’s usually stuff that brings forth fear.  The acronym reminds us that often what we make up is an illusion.  It just appears true because we’re really good at painting portraits of calamity.  We need to stop because what we make up might eventually become our reality.

As leaders, we have an extra responsibility of helping our teams eliminate false evidence from their point of view.  We must ask ourselves how we behave in the face of change.  If we make stuff up and act as though it’s real, that gives our teams a first-class ticket to the do the same.  Choose instead to make stuff up that paints a positive picture of the future.  Help others prepare for change by staying grounded in reality and dealing with what’s important moment by moment.  Here are some other things you can do to help your teams fight F.E.A.R.

• Establish and reinforce a clear vision.  What’s the outcome or the end game?  When everyone has a shared focus on a positive outcome, it’s easier to focus on possibilities rather than calamities.
• Talk about loss.  Any change involves some letting go.  So, allow it to be a natural part of the process.  Sometimes what we make up is that what we have to let go of is far superior to what’s coming, and that’s often not the case.
• Talk about potential.  Help people see the possibilities as they emerge and become clear.  Highlight them and link them to the overall vision of success.
• Nip F.E.A.R. in the bud.  When you hear false evidence being widely reported, call the team together and clear things up.  Make sure any “buzz” about what’s coming is constructive and truthful.
• Reinforce strengths.  Remind your team members that they are capable and competent and that you have faith in their ability to persevere and succeed through change.  Sometimes, people’s fear is nothing more than a worry about failure.  Clear that up right away.

Fearlessly,

Lynae

Lessons from the WIZ

I have been traveling a lot lately and miss being home. As much as I love the work that I do, I find that business travel can be quite exhausting sometimes – probably because I don’t have my own bed to sleep in or my favorite chair to relax into at the end of the day.

I found my mind replaying the same message today. over and over again; “there’s no place like home…there’s no place like home…there’s no place like home…”

Remember that movie? Watching the Wizard of Oz was a tradition in my household as I was growing up.

That classic movie had such an impact on me.

• I grew up on a farm in a small town and it caused me to dream about adventures in faraway places.
• The desires of the characters to obtain a “heart”, “courage” and a “brain” are exactly the qualities that I most admire in others and when I’m most honoring of myself, they are the qualities that I admire in myself.
• The fear the the Wicked Witch was bigger than it needed to be – she was melted away with water! Sometimes I let my “fears” get the best of me and make them bigger than they need to be.

The most meaning message in the movie for me was the camaraderie and friendship of diverse individuals who came together on their journey to support each other to be the best they could be. And…the journey was not without conflict.

The lessons that I think individuals and teams can take from the story of the Wizard of Oz are:

1. Everyone has their strengths and the team is stronger because of it.
2. Face your fears and you’ll probably find that they are not as big as you are imagining them to be.
3. Pursue your goals and don’t give up and you’ll find what you are looking for – sometimes in ways that you hadn’t imagined.

Respectfully yours,

Georgine

Curveballs

Recently, my yoga instructor opened class with this philosophical ditty:  “When life throws you a curveball, try to find the wisdom and grace to look upward and say: ‘Nice pitch!’” Well, he got me with that one . . . I’ve shared it with friends, clients and colleagues repeatedly.  Since then, I’ve been pre-occupied with thinking about how I react when life throws me curveballs.  Usually, I get frustrated.  Then, I get irritated.  Suddenly, it looks as though there are more curveballs being thrown my way.  Because─now I’m looking through a lens that filters everything so I see problems or challenges where I might not have otherwise.  When a curveball heads my way, sometimes I throw my bat instead of simply accepting that, for the moment, I’ve been bested.

The wisdom and grace to say “nice pitch” would allow me to accept that I missed a pitch!  So what?  That doesn’t make me ineffective or incapable or incompetent.  It makes me human.  Joe DiMaggio had a lifetime batting average of .398, and he’s considered one of the greatest ball players in history.  That’s a swell average!  And, it means he missed some pitches too.  While sports analogies aren’t exactly my forte, this one helps me point out that being great doesn’t mean being perfect.  It means accepting that sometimes you swing and miss.  Wisdom and grace allows us all to accept our humanity─our strengths, our weaknesses, and our potential.

As leaders, we have to keep in mind how our responses to curveballs provide a model for how our teams deal with their own misses.  Here are some questions for reflection:

• Does your team see you throw the bat? Or, do they see you smile, step back, take a breath, and try again?
• How do you expect your team to deal with curveballs?
• Do you create an environment where it’s okay to swing and miss once in a while?
• How do you help your team learn to watch for curveballs so they are ready to respond appropriately?
• When someone “hits one out of the park” do you take a close look and find out why so you can ensure it happens again and again?

Batter up!

Lynae