Posted on June 3rd, 2010
This week I’ve been thinking about trust; the influence it has on relationships, the impact it has on our work, and the process that creates it. I have seen evidence in many organizational cultures that trust can easily erode during challenging or changing times.
As I reflect back on the employee groups that we have worked with to build a respectful workplace, the common experience I’ve had with all groups is that everyone recognizes the power of trust and wants to build trusting relationships with more people at work.
Our experience with employees is that it’s pretty easy to identify what a trusting relationship looks like. All we have to do is think about one that we have in our lives. The characteristics that are identified are always the same.
- You feel you can depend on them no matter what the situation – they “have your back”
- You can talk about anything and information flows freely – even constructive feedback because you believe they care and have the best intentions
- Listening to each other is a common practice
- Confidentiality is honored
- You are able to work out disagreements – these relationships endure conflict and differences are honored
- Trust gets built over time. It’s a process.
The real challenge for most of us is how to regain trust that has been lost or diminished and act on it.
Here is some great advice that one employee group offered as they worked to answer the question: What can I do to help regain or rebuild trust in a relationship where it’s been lost or diminished?
- Approach the other person and request a time to talk
- State your intentions – i.e. you want a stronger, healthier relationship
- Stay mindful of your own behavior and manage your emotions, staying true to your intent
- Be honest, share your perceptions (using “I” statements) and request what you want/need
- Ask the other person for their perspective and what they would request
- Restate what you heard and commit to what you can and will do to build a more trusting relationship
- Forgive the past, start fresh in the present and create a better future relationship
- Persevere – trust is a process that develops over time
Best wishes,
Georgine
