Posted on July 27th, 2010
Over the weekend of July 15th, Georgine and I attended the International eWomenNetwork Conference in Dallas. Among several great speakers was the incomparable and much beloved Zig Ziglar. In spite of being 85 and having suffered some minor short term memory loss as a result of a fall in his home more than 3 years ago, he is still traveling the world spreading his message of inspiration and motivation. With the help of his daughter (who interviews him and helps him remember things), he shared stories about his childhood, his long-term marriage, and the importance of family – something he refers to as the “home court advantage.” His talk was heartwarming and poignant.
Of all the things he said, one thing had the greatest impact on me. He said, “You can have anything you want if you help others get what they want.” This idea is central to respect because it’s about doing for others, honoring the needs of others, and recognizing that there may be others who require support more immediately than you do. Now, I admit . . . this can be hard at times. I speak from experience when I say that sometimes when I’m in need, I’m convinced that it is indeed the most important thing happening. It takes self-awareness and humility to recognize and internalize that the world doesn’t revolve solely around me (or you).
When Madd-Steiny works with clients to manage change, we encourage small acts of getting what you want through helping others get what they want. This is especially important during times of change because just about everyone is dealing with some sense of loss or struggling through transition. Everyone needs something. So, by helping others, there is an energy shift that takes place and the result is more space for solutions. Sometimes, by focusing on the needs of others, we learn that our needs are not as significant as we initially thought – we might even let go of something because it’s clear that it doesn’t matter as much as someone else’s need. Here are some things you can do to get more of what you want, during times of change or any time:
· Every day, ask at least one person: “How can I support you today?”
· Offer to take something off a co-worker’s plate.
· Take on some extra assignments to reduce someone else’s workload.
· Listen with compassion (and without talking) when a colleague needs to “let off some steam.”
· Recognize the successes of your teammates loudly and proudly.
When I’ve taken the time to extend a hand to help others, it has always helped me get what I want. I hope the same is true for you.
Lynae
